


The Forging of a Man

by Goethicite



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: Backstory, Dog Dies, Multi, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Racism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-09
Updated: 2014-03-09
Packaged: 2018-01-15 03:19:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,551
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1289173
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Goethicite/pseuds/Goethicite
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Slade Wilson was a good man once.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Forging of a Man

**Author's Note:**

> I'm going to blame this unreservedly on my little sister. Her description of Slade Wilson was 'Mack Gerhardt if he'd been raised by angry lesbians.' So I wrote her a story where Slade Wilson was raised by angry lesbians in Western Australia instead of finishing my Fletchers chapters.

i

"Go." Mama stood over Slade with a kitchen knife in her hand. "Walk along the road until the police come." The delicate, curling tattoo on her chin and lips was barely visible beneath the blood leaking from her mouth.

Slade nodded frantically, clutching Woofer's collar to keep the dog from running to the other room where his old man was screaming. "Yes, Mama."

"Tell the police to call your Aunt Chaz. Do whatever she tells you to," she continued firmly. The kitchen door she'd locked behind her began to groan beneath the assault of fists and feet from the other side. Slade nodded again obediently. He knew the police didn't care about a drunken miner beating on his Maori wife and their half-breed son. The last officer to come to the house had said so. But he'd try to make them listen this time. Mama smiled and kissed his forehead, nose, and mouth before shoving him towards the back door. "I love you, my bold little warrior. Take care of Woofer and make sure to drink plenty of water."

With a sob, Slade threw himself into his mother's arms. "I will, Mama. I promise. I love you too." Mama held him tightly until he could barely breath. Behind them, the door made an ominous crack.

Mama shoved Slade away again barking, "Go!"

Slade ran, whistling for Woofer to follow. His sneakers churned up the dust of the dirt road leading to town. He ran until his chest hurt ached like an open wound, and he collapsed gasping for air. Woofer whined and licked his face. Slade dragged the dog down into a hug, crying into the soft fur as he hid his face to make sure no one would see how weak he was.

By the time the police found him there, Slade's eyes were dry and Woofer was quiet.

ii

The last time Slade had seen Aunt Chaz was his eighth birthday. She'd had a week off from the mine and had stopped by to see him and Mama and to drop off the puppy who'd grown into Woofer. Slade remembered that day clearly, because Dad had picked a fight with Aunt Chaz. When he'd threatened her, she'd laid him out with a single punch that crushed his nose. Slade had been awed by her strength and fearlessness.

She was shorter than Slade remembered. Chaz was a stocky woman with reddish-brown hair cut short and a jaw like a bulldog distinguishing an otherwise plain face. It was the same jaw Slade shared with his father. Hers was jutted all the way out as she stalked through the police station to Slade's side. She pulled a chair from another desk to sit across from him. Slade gripped Woofer's collar tightly.

Chaz sighed as she grabbed Slade's chin and examined the bruises on his face. "Did these bludgers tell you what happened, kid?"

"Dad's dead. Mama might as well be," Slade replied without inflection.

"Close enough." Chaz let him go, tipping her chair back onto two legs. "You've got a choice to make, Slade. My life isn't exactly suited to watching after you. I work long hours and come home tired. Supper's gonna come out of the freezer, and you'll be on your own a lot if you come with me. Or, child services will find you a nice family to stay with until your old enough to go to uni."

Slade swallowed. "What about Woofer?"

Chaz's face went soft. "I'd look after him even if you can't take him into the system with you."

"I want to be with Woofer," Slade said in the most grownup voice he could manage. "No matter what. He's my only mate, Aunt Chaz."

"Okay," Chaz said quietly. "My ute's out front. It's a long way back to Newman. I'll be out as soon as I finish signing the papers they have for me. When did you last eat?" Slade shrugged. "We'll pick up some tucker on the way. Shoo now."

Slade ran out the old, blue pickup in the parking lot. He curled up with Woofer on the bench seat in the sun. When he woke up, they were already rumbling out town with Chaz at the wheel. "You've been sleeping for about an hour, kid," Chaz said when she saw his frantic glances. "Do you want to stop by the house and get anything?"

She yanked the wheel over and shoved Slade out the door to the side of the road before he vomited with more luck than skill. "Or not," Chaz muttered. "Rinse out your mouth and get back in, kid. We don't have time for this."

Slade caught the bottle of water she tossed him and rinsed and spit twice before drinking the rest. "No. I have to go get my clothes and boots. I only have what I'm wearing." He took a deep breath. "It's fine. I just haven't eaten in awhile."

"Horseshit," Chaz said bluntly as he climbed back in the truck. "Is there anything there you're actually attached to? Or are you worried about money to replace everything?" Slade looked down at his hands. Chaz turned the truck back onto the road and kept driving. He looked up sharply when they passed the turnoff to the house without slowing down. "It's only money, kid. Don't worry about it."

iii

Slade stopped by the billabong before rounding the bend to the trailer he and Chaz shared. Sometimes she came home early when the school called her. He cleaned the blood off his face and knuckles in the muddy water. She'd know from the dirt smears he was hiding something, but at least she wouldn't look as disappointed. The smell of copper was getting to him anyways, reminding him of the house after Mama and the old man had fought.

He was wiping the last of the water off his face with the hem of his t-shirt when he saw the Land Rover parked beneath the bare shade at the edge of the gum tree grove behind where the trailer was. Chaz's truck was no where in sight. Slade froze as he realized Woofer hadn't run out and greeted him yet. His breath started coming in sharp pants. Chaz had a rifle above her bed and a shotgun by the door, but the trailer was so far away.

"Hello?" A slender, beautiful woman came around the side of the trailer with Woofer trailing behind her. Her eyes landed on Slade, and the strangest series of expressions twitched through her mouth from confusion to recognition to anger and bitterness to fondness. "Hello. You must be Slade. I'm Jia Peng." She didn't sound local, let alone Australian. "I work with your aunt at the mine. She's got some of my books. I need them back."

Slade found himself blushing without really knowing why. He knew her. Chaz had pictures of herself and Jia hiking the outback scattered through the trailer, but they were from before Slade had moved in with her. Chaz said Jia was from Canada, a geologist at the mine where Chaz worked as the senior blaster. Jia tilted her head slightly. "Slade, are you okay, sweetheart?"

"Yeah," Slade stuttered, lowering his eyes to pet Woofer and hide his embarrassment. "Sorry, couldn't quite place you. Come on in. Can I get you a cuppa?"

Jia hesitated as Slade walked over to the door and fumbled to unlock it. "Tea would be wonderful actually. Thank you, Slade." She followed him into the trailer's kitchen.

Slade tossed Woofer a rawhide to keep him out the way while he started the kettle. "Aunt Chaz keeps most of the books in her study. But…" He looked around at the stacks of books piled on every flat surface. It gave the appearance of mess, but Chaz really did keep a clean home. They just had more books than space. "Well, I don't know where she would have put them." He poured the hot water into two mugs and dropped a tea bag into each. 

"It's fine," Jia said with laughter in her voice as she accepted mug. "I know how she is. How are you adjusting to school here? Chaz said you came from a much bigger town."

They made small talk about how Slade was doing at school and his new position on the rugby team. Slade smiled awkwardly and tried not to trip over his tongue too often as he embraced the distraction from the fight he kept replaying in his head. Jia was smart, uni educated from the way she spoke, and multi-lingual. She swore in Chinese when she accidental spilled hot tea on her hand. When Chaz's truck rumbled up, she was teaching Slade useful curse words.

"Kid," Chaz bellowed as she slammed the door to the truck shut. "Guess who left a message with Ops this morning while I was on the pattern in North Pit?" The screen door opened with a loud slap. Chaz hadn't showered yet, and her face and jumpsuit were streaked with red mud. She froze when she saw Jia at the table. "Fuck."

"Hello to you too, Chaz," Jia said with fond exasperation. "I need my ore petrology references back."

Chaz relaxed, smacking herself on the forehead with the heel of her hand. "Of course. Sorry, love, completely forgot about those. Let me pack'em up." She unzipped her coveralls and kicked off her boots, letting heavy, dirty canvas land in a pile on the floor. Beneath the coveralls, her men's boxers and undershirt were soaked through with sweat.

Slade wrinkled his nose at the smell. "Long day?" he asked sharply. It was stupid to get annoyed by something they both dealt with every day living in the heat of Australia, but he didn't want to explain to Chaz again why he'd lost himself in punches and kicks.

"Longer when I got a call from your school telling me you'd been fighting in the halls again," Chaz replied with a dry disapproval. "We need to talk, kid. After Jia leaves."

Wincing, Slade looked down into his tea rather than meet his aunt's eyes, trying to avoid the marks on his hands as well. Chaz disappeared into her office to find Jia's books. Jia reached over and put her hand on Slade's arm. "Why were you fighting, sweetheart?" Her dark eyes were calm and empathetic when Slade finally dragged his gaze away from the dregs of his tea.

"They don’t like me because of how I look, not white you know? Some of the kids were throwing stuff at me and calling me names like they usually do. And I just got ropeable so fast I didn't even realize how mad I was." He glanced instinctively at the bruises on his knuckles before he could stop himself. "I didn't mean to."

"Oh baby," Jia said gently. "I get it. The kids at school used to give me so much shit because my parents are Chinese. I get it. Hey."

Slade realized he was crying. It was stupid. He hadn't cried since Mama had shoved him out the backdoor. Jia moved around the table to hug him tightly. He buried his face in her stomach and held on. Chaz asked, "Kid?" from somewhere in the hall.

"The kids at school were being racist little assholes," Jia said grimly above him. "Chaz, yelling isn't going fix this, baby. Okay? Just…" Jia trailed off, rubbing Slade's back. "Sweetheart, your aunt and I need to talk. Why don't you take Woofer for a walk and calm down?"

Stumbling to his feet, Slade mumbled agreement and whistled for his dog. He struck out for the ridge at the edge of Chaz's property.

Iv

Jia started coming by Chaz's place three or four times a week after Slade cried all over her. She helped Slade with his homework and talked to him about the kids and teachers who looked down their noses because he was Maori. Chaz, armed with a detailed account of what Slade had been put through, tore into the school administrator and saw his tormentors suspended. Slade became captain of the rugby team and Jia and Chaz made it to every game. The other kids started respecting him if not outright liking him.

Slade thought things were better. He was almost happy in Newman. Though he still missed Mama every day. Then he came home from school to Jia's Land Rover and Chaz's truck both parked in front of the trailer. The door to the kitchen was open and he could hear yelling.

Jia was swearing in Chinese followed by, "I spent eighteen months in Nunavik for you, Chaz. Nunavik! So you could get Slade settled in without anyone looking over our shoulders. Now, you're telling me it doesn't matter? That I'm supposed to just go. Fuck you."

"Jia, if someone finds out," Chaz said in a quieter voice, but it was still audible to Slade as he crouched behind the truck. Woofer was hiding underneath the vehicle shaking. Slade crawled beside him, draping an arm over the dog.

"No one's going to take Slade away from us. No one except you cares, Chaz. Your fucking father and your useless drunk brother completely fucked up your head." Jia was gasping in between bellows. "And I'm tired of dealing with it. If it weren't for Slade, I'd go back to that icy hellhole where they pay three times what I make here. So you can hate yourself in peace!" She stormed out of the house with a scream of frustration.

Chaz ran after her shouting, "Jia, love. Wait." She grabbed the other woman's arm and spun her in place. They embraced, and Chaz kissed Jia in the middle of the porch. Slade muffled his gasp of surprise in Woofer's fur. "Don't go. I didn't mean it like that, baby. Please. Let's talk about this."

"That would be a first, you talking about something important," Jia snarled wetly. She pulled away, hugging herself. "Tell Slade I'm sorry I missed him. I'll see him at the game this weekend."

"Jia," Chaz said, and she sounded ragged. Slade held tighter to Woofer. Chaz was never ragged, never uncertain. She was a mean bitch and proud of it. She ran her blasting crews with an iron fist and perfect safety record and had taught Slade how to throw a punch without breaking his fingers. Chaz was crying silently.

Slade laid very still. He knew that getting in the middle of two adults fighting would just make it turn violent. Woofer snuggled close tail tentatively wagging at his master's proximity. It was the motion that caught Chaz's eye. "Jia, underneath the truck." Both women dropped to the their knees, peering down at Slade. "Shit." Slade wasn't sure which one of them had spoken.

He screamed when Jia reached over to grab his ankle, kicking out. "Don't touch me!"

"Don't, love. His father," Chaz said urgently.

"Shit," Jia said fiercely, moving back. "I'm sorry, sweetheart. I didn't mean to scare you." She sat back on her heels, sighing in frustration.

Chaz laid flat on the ground so she was eye level with Slade. "Hey, kid, it's okay. This just isn't how we wanted you to find out about us."

"No hitting, please, Aunt Chaz," Slade babbled desperately. "Please."

Chaz's face crumpled. "Oh, kid, no one's gonna hit anyone. I promise. It's just a stupid blue." She reached out an arm. "Come here, Slade. Come on. Let's go inside and talk. No more yelling, no more wobblies. I promise. Plus, Jia'd glass me if I tried to act like your dad. Right, Jia?"

"I'd shred you like a cat with a toy mouse," Jia said reassuringly.

Slade slowly allowed himself to coaxed out from under the truck and onto the couch in Chaz's office where he was cuddled between the two women. They explained slowly, painfully for Chaz, that not everyone was okay with two women loving each other. Slade would have to keep the secret too, or social services might try to take him away. Slade agreed on the condition Chaz got another trailer so Jia could live with them without him having to sleep in the room next to their bedroom.

v

Slade was good at being in the military. He'd spent years walking softly and talking carefully around strangers to protect the women who'd raised him. The natural reserve, which only eased around close friends and family, made him appear an obedient recruit. Jia wasn't happy he'd decided to go to the army instead of uni, but Chaz had been very firm about letting Slade make his own decision. He had agreed to a degree at some point for Jia to let it go.

ASIS hadn't even been a consideration until one of the training officers showed his true colors on a weeklong field exercise by verbally and physically assaulting one the indigenous recruits. Slade had broken the cunt's jaw despite having only four months training behind him. Rather than a court martial, he'd found himself recruited by Spartacus Thrace, one of ASIS's best shooters and a demon with a sword.

Chaz did have a problem with her nephew disappearing into the blackest of black organizations in Australia. Slade had pleaded for weeks by letter and phone before she reluctantly agreed he was old enough to make the decision for himself even though he was only twenty.

ASIS was what Slade had been searching for without knowing what he needed. They sicked him on the bullies and evil men of the world, men like his father would have been if given any power beyond the shack at the end of a dirt road. Slade picked up duel swords and a sub-machine gun with glee to cut them down. Jia and Chaz never did stop worrying, but they eventually just kept it to pointed looks instead of trying to argue with him.

Billy Wintergreen was five years older and four missions more experience than Slade. He was sarcastic, sometimes a bit mean, but always had Slade's back. Billy was the first man who didn’t set Slade's teeth on edge just by breathing.

Slade eagerly learned everything Billy could teach, and when he started making up tricks of his own, Billy had nothing but praise. The day Jia called to say Woofer had died, Billy got Slade so drunk the younger soldier had sobbed into his partner's shoulder for the better part of the night. They woke up tangled together on the couch the next morning, and Slade had felt safe instead of homicidal.

Hung over and nauseous in the bright light of morning, Slade told Billy everything. About being eight, with Woofer just a wiggling bundle of warm fur in his arms, watching Chaz layout his old man like a pro boxer. About the night Mama decided Slade had been hit one too many times. About the names the cops had called him when they found him by the side of the road. About Chaz and Jia raising him into a good man despite the odds against it. About how Woofer had been there for everything, the only witness to Slade's ascension from hell.

After Slade spilled his guts into a steaming pile, Billy kissed him on the forehead and told him it was over. No one would ever lay hands on Slade again, because Billy had swords and a mean streak. Billy called him little brother while hugging Slade so tightly neither could breath very well. Like little boys, they'd cut themselves smearing the wounds together to make it real. Blood brothers, inseparable.

vi

Slade met Tui when he came home to Chaz's for Christmas. She was a geotechnical engineer, newly promoted to supervise Chaz's blasting operations. Her chin tattoo looked like Mama's. She'd picked out the engagement band she wanted from the only jeweler in town before he left for the next mission.

When he came back to marry her, her belly was round and full of his son. Chaz and Jia wavered between ecstatic at the thought of a grandchild and uncertain that Slade's marriage was a happy one. Slade tried to reassure them, because not everyone got to fall in love like they were. Some people, like him and Tui, settled for not being alone.

Billy flew out for little Joe's birth of course. He'd been the first to hold Slade's son while Slade held his wife. The birth was hard on Tui. She spent more time in the hospital recovering than their son. Slade stayed at her side the whole time. Chaz and Jia were perfectly capable of caring for Joe, and Billy was protecting all three of them.

It was in the week and half at the hospital he and Tui cemented their relationship. Tui didn't really need him there. She'd was free spirit who needed space from humanity just to keep breathing. Newman suited her well for just that reason. Joe existed because she'd decided she wanted a baby. If she hadn't, Slade would have never even known. He loved that about her. His mother's protective streak ran strong in him, but there was the lingering fear he'd follow his heart, loving and loyal, like she had. Tui would never let him close enough to lose himself like Mama had to the old man.

Chaz retired to part time supervisor after Tui went back to work. She bought two more trailers and put one by the billabong for Tui and Joe to live in. The third she'd put in the gum tree grove next to the ones Slade grew up in for Billy and whoever else Slade brought home with him. Domesticity suited her shockingly well. She cooked, cleaned, and raised Joe with the kind of devotion Slade had been too damaged to allow. Jia kept working at the mine full time, but even she was slowing down more each time Slade came home.

Before the mission which ended with Slade stranded for half a decade, he'd gone home with Billy for a quick vacation. They'd eaten too much barbeque, drank beer, and Slade had tried not to see the silver in Jia's black hair. Chaz had started going gray before he'd joined the army. She claimed Slade was responsible for each gray hair individually due to his teenage antics. Of course, her accusations always came with an engulfing hug and kiss to his cheek to ease any sting.

vii

The night before Billy and Slade left Newman, Tui told Billy to play doting godfather and took Slade to her trailer. They made love then fucked. Then Slade knelt on the floor and did his best to turn cunnilingus into a declaration of affection with just his mouth since Tui was holding both his hands.

When she came, thighs shuddering around his head, her grip on his fingers just got tighter. It was possessive in a way Tui never was. So Slade wasn't surprised by the grim look on her face when he crawled back on the bed. "I got another job offer, a really good one," Tui said quietly, running her thumb across his bottom lip. "There's a new mine in the Philippines that needs a senior geotechinical engineer to design and manage a slope monitoring program from scratch."

"Okay," Slade said cautiously, "will they pay for the plane tickets?"

"They want me to move out there for the first five years," Tui replied. She pulled him close as he flinched. "Slade, I'm not going to take your son. I would never do that to you. Joe's your child. I couldn't break your heart like that."

Slade inhaled the scent her shampoo and sweat, shuddering. "Okay. No, I'm fine. I'm listening, sweetheart. So if you and Joe aren't leaving me, what's the problem?"

"We've been married what, almost six years now," Tui asked quietly as she nuzzled the scruff he hadn't shaved that morning. "And it's been good enough to keep us going. So that gives you a right to make this choice. I'm going. Joe can stay with Jia and Chaz, and I'll come visit when I can, but I'm moving to the Philippines in three months. Do you want to stay married or get divorced before I leave?"

"Well fuck, woman," Slade growled, playfully biting her shoulder despite the sinking in his stomach. "You were scaring me. Of course we're staying married, the benefits will better for you and Joe if a mission goes tits up."

Tui tangled her fingers in his hair and held in place to look her in the eye. "Slade, I'm not going years without sex. There will be other men."

Slade shrugged holding her gaze to show he understood the gravity of what she was saying. "You're the mother of my son, Tui. And I'll always love you because you gave me Joe. But we married each other because the alternative was being alone. Not because there was a grand romance. Send me a postcard sometimes and make sure to call our son."

To surprise, Tui started crying little, hiccupping sobs. "I love you, Slade Wilson," she said fiercely as she rolled them to straddle his hips. "I love you more than I thought I would. And I'll remember you for the rest of my life. I would even if you hadn't given me Joe. I may even miss you."

Propping himself against the headboard, Slade wrapped his arms around his wife and kissed her until she moaned. "You were my wife." His whisper was more of a hiss as he nipped her neck. "I'm just happy to be the only man you were ever willing to marry." They made love one last time as husband and wife with Tui on his lap, pressing their wet cheeks together as they moved.

viii

The mirakuru makes dreams so vivid they might as well be real. Slade both hates and loves them. Some nights he wakes up shaking with his father in the other room. Others, it's Shado in his arms and Oliver curled up against his back. Chaz and Jia never knew their boy found something better than just not being alone. Even if he'd lost it just a quickly with the able assistance of his own stupidity. Jia would tear him a new one if she realized just how much he'd bought into a misogynistic, heteronormative narrative just as he had Shado and Oliver within in his reach.

Jia would never know though. The mirakuru had destroyed all of Slade's carefully cultivated control, the rules and habits of a lifetime to make sure he would never become his father. The part of him that remembered hiding under Chaz's pickup with Woofer knew how dangerous he would be to his family. Since he's already willing to turn on Oliver, his and Shado's beloved boy, there sn't anything to stop him from hurting his son and aunts. If Shado had live, Slade knows in his heart that he would have to run from her too or watch himself become the monster he always feared.

Instead, Slade lays down ever night and closes his eyes. The nights he dreams about Shado, Joe, Tui, Chaz, Jia, Mama, and even Oliver and Billy are worth the nightmares of their blood on his and his father's hands.


End file.
